Fess Up Wannabe

Here's a little known fact:
Deep, deep, deeeeeeeep down inside of me lives a tough, mean, ornery, hardened by life badass.
Yep.
It's true.

Don't be scared.
No need to take cover.
She's not going to cause any trouble.
She's dormant and has been dormant for many, many years.
But she's there.
She is so there.

She's halfhearted though.
Kinda wishy washy.
Oh, she may pop her head out on occasion.
Put that mad face on.
She will curse and cuss and carry on if something or someone presses that annoyance button.
But sadly, embarrassingly, that's about all the action you'll get out of her.

You know the tv show 'Dog the Bounty Hunter' ?
You know his wife Beth ?
Beth Chapman ?
Yeah.
That's what I'm talking about.
My inner fighter is like Beth.
She will slap you silly.
Grrrrrrrrrr !

maybe.

I'm pretty convinced I was the baddest badass of them all somewhere down the line.
Somewhere long ago and far away
& every once in awhile that dissident in me is itchin to get out.
So, just to be safe, it's probably best if you stay on my good side.
You can never be too careful.

Yep. Yep.

I am a Wannabe Badass
& I WILL knock some heads around someday.
Just you wait and see .. ! ..

errr
uh

never mind.

Fess.
Fess.

:)

I Am My Feelings

Pen Pals

My very first pen pal was my uncle.
Uncle Dennis. 
I was ten years old or thereabouts and he was in the Army.
I don't recall who sent that first letter but, there were many letters
& oh the joy of receiving each and every one.

I remember the days of patiently waiting on our front porch for 'Mr Mailman'.
I'd happily run that mail inside to Mom.
Here ! Here !
She would sort through and ... and ... and... YES !
A Letter !!
It was such a wonderful feeling of glee.

I'm pretty sure I still have my uncle's letters.
They should be tucked away, deep inside my attic.
I put them there years ago.
I just couldn't bring myself to throw them out so, I didn't.
My letters and I will be reunited soon because that attic is next on my list of to dos.
YaY.
I can't wait !

There is nothing in this world like a handwritten letter.
Me to You.
I'll take the time and you'll take the time and we will write to each other.
Back and forth and back and forth.
Your thoughts. My thoughts.
Your personalized penmanship.
My personalized penmanship.

awwww.
Memories.

When I was in high school my very best friend in the whole wide world and I would write notes.
I remember sitting in Study Hall bored out of my mind because Anna wasn't there.
So.
I would write her a note
& I would tell her all about my boring Study Hall and whatever else I had on my mind that day.
We would see each other in between classes or at lunch and exchange our precious correspondence
& although some would call me a letter hoarder, I'm so hoping my Anna notes are tucked away in my attic too.
It will be an awesome trip back to a wonderfully naive time.

awwww.
Handwriting.

Just the other day as I was sorting through some mundane mail, something oh so refreshing caught my eye.
It was a handwritten, no special occasion, it's not even my birthday card from my very thoughtful friend Carol.
She took the time out of her busy life to send me a card.
A wonderful card of encouragement
& the beautiful thing is, she has sent me other cards, on other days.
They are my little handwritten reminders from my very nice person
& they always seem to arrive, like magic, when I need them most.
& yep
I tuck them away in a very special spot.
I look at Carol's cursive words every time I need a boost of 'Oh Yes I Can !"
& yep
I will save them forever.

Handwriting.
Signatures.
Person to Person.
Taking the time to sit down and write.
Not type.
Not text.
Write.

Dear Me:
I think a trip to the post office is in your near future.
You need to mail out some handwritten glee to a lot of lovely people.
Sincerely yours,
Me

:)

I Am My Feelings

Hark

Christmas songs have been following me around these last few days.
I have a few on my playlist and they keep popping up for me to hear
so, I keep listening.

I usually don't jump songs.
If  it's 'Hark the Herald Angels Sing' on a hot, humid July day, so be it.
It feels a bit weird but, I'll let Carrie Underwood sing it anyway.
Or Karen Carpenter and her 'Merry Christmas Darling'

waaaaa
get's me every time

or Kelly Clarkson's beautiful 'My Grown Up Christmas Wish'

ooooo that's a good one

These are songs that I love.
I chose to put them on my playlist
& it was a long, drawn out, slow, tedious, don't ever ask me to do this again process that brought these tunes to my musical device.
Or so say my daughters.

So yes.
I will listen to each and every song in it's entirety and shuffle-y randomness.
Even if it's a bunch of Christmas songs showing up in the summertime.

I figure it's the universe talking to me.
It's giving me a lovely, little subliminal message.
I just have to figure out what this message means.

Christmas songs.
hmmmmm

It could mean Peace on Earth, good will towards men.
or
Don't procrastinate. Get the shopping done early this year.
or
Spread  that Christmas joy ! C'mon !
or
Make that Christmas list now or you'll be sorry you didn't later.

Or maybe ...
Just listen to these wonderful words.
Enjoy them in July.

Ok then.
I will.

YaY.

Have Yourself a Merry Little Monday.

:)

I Am My Feelings

Our Spot

I do it every year.
Loaded up with chairs, blankets and snacks, I arrive at the park.
&
Yep.
I know I am way, waaaaay early for fireworks.
But, I really don't think two hours is all that long to wait.

I like to get there before everyone else so I can claim our spot.
Our fireworks viewing spot.
It's a good one.
Right smack on the middle of it all.
Not too close, not too far.
Truth be told, it's kinda perfect.

My family and I have sat in the same spot every 4th of July for as long as I can remember.
In fact, if someone else ever got to the park before me and sat in that spot, I'd have to shoo them away.
Hey there you ! ! That's OUR spot.

I have no problem being fireworks ready way waaaaay too early.
& btw ...
I'm not the only one.
There are always other early birds at the park claiming their spots as well.

Sometimes a family member joins me in my wait.
Sometimes I am by myself.
Either way works for me because there's plenty to do in that two hour interval.

People to watch.
A sunset to admire.
Quiet sounds of an empty park to enjoy.
Yep.
Way waaaaay early works for me.

Ahhhh.

My silly obsession with an early arrival works out for my family too.
They can show up whenever they want with no need to wonder where to sit.
They already know.

So to those who will ask if I'm going to the park way waaaaay early again this year...?
Oh yes.
Yes I am.

I'll be patiently, blissfully waiting in the best spot of all.
Our spot.

:)

I Am My Feelings