Zinged

I get that you have found a nice, new place
& I understand why you wouldn't want anyone or anything intruding into your space.
It's quiet.
It's shaded. 
It's hidden from the hustle and bustle of the world.
It's a perfect spot, if you ask me.

But, um, you didn't ask me because you're a wasp
& that comfortable coziness you've been calling home ?
Yeah.
That's my recycle bin
oh & that hand that soooooooo ! irritates you each and every time it opens the lid ?
uh, yep.
That'd be mine
& ouch.
You got me again.

I wouldn't call them stings, 'cause I've been 'sting-ed' many times and I very much know the feel.
No.
This is more of a zap, a zing.
A definite warning to stay away
OR ELSE.

Or else.

Hmmmm.

That's where we have a teeny tiny, itsy bitsy problem, Mr Wasp.
You see, I'm kinda sorta a recycle freak
& I pretty much need to use your new digs ALL THE TIME
So why you had to pick that specific spot is somewhat unfortunate
& just WHY ??!? you need to get SO ANGRY is completely beyond me.

All I'm doing is opening, tossing whatever needs to be tossed and moving on.
You on the other hand have an attitude, fella.
MUST you be so agitated, so consistently, uncompromisingly irritated ??
geez
This would be a whole lot easier if you'd lighten up.
We could coexist.
We could share.
We could ...
ah
never mind.
I'm thinking you just want to be angry.
It's your thing, your M.O.
& I'm quite certain some inhabitants of Planet Earth can relate. 
But, what a bummer.
It's so much better on the bright side.

So, yeah.
We're going to have to figure this out, Grumpy Pants, because I can't be walking through my days worrying about you and your internal combustion issues.
I'll have you know, I can handle my share of zings but, this is getting ridiculous.

All I ask is that you tone it down a bit, a notch.
Can you pleaseeeee just turn the madness down one, simple notch ?

I, in return, shall remain calm.
I'll be composed.
I will tolerate and try.
But, just so you know, Patience has it's eventual way of zapping too.

zowie.

:)

I Am My Feelings

Thanks, Kids

I have spent a good portion of my life around children.
Caring for those little ones is a career choice I have always loved and never doubted.
It is what I was meant to do, to be.

Babysitting, daycare, preschool.
Watching the nieces and nephews.
Raising my own
& now, those perfect grandsons of mine  ...
Yep.
I adore them all
& I truly treasure each moment spent with every child in my care.

The innocence and wonder of youth will forever fascinate me.
So honest.
So amazing.
Enjoying the world through those fresh, little eyeballs will never, ever get old.

You feel so happy that you want to run around a tree ?
Burst into song just because ?
Dance, dance, dance... ! ... to whatever gleeful melody is running through your brain ?
Children hand us these spontaneous delights daily

& children approach each other all the time, become instant pals because they just happen to be the same height.
With a simple 'wanna play?'
Boom.
Friends.

No inhibitions.
No judging.

Pay attention to the children of the world, Grownups.
I am convinced those little people carry every answer we will ever need.
To go through life so open, so loving, so carefree.
Yep.

It's priceless.
It's beautiful.
It's an Every. Single. Day. Gift.

Thank You, Kids.
You have taught me well.

:)

I Am My Feelings

For The Birds

I call them 'things' but, I guess I could also say events
or situations
or happenings.

so, um
THINGS always seem to happen to me in threes.
As if begging to be acknowledged, they gentle nudge until I become aware of their presence
& then ?
it's a self induced knock upside my head.

DUH !

HOW did I not SEE this before ?!???

gaaaaaa.

! ! ! ! ??? ! ! !

Anyways, threes.
THINGS always happen to me in threes.

Except for birds.

I could offer a mile long list of bird stories.
In fact, looking back at my archive of blogs, I have written about birds quite often.

Hee Hee, my cheery little mystery that happily brightens my days.
The woodpecker that works ever so diligently on my big, bald tree.
The geese that taunt me on my walking trail.
The hawks that continue their summer courtship with their high pierced screech and daring dives.
The ducks.
The robins.
The cardinals and herons.

Seems birds are continually fluttering in and out of my life,
which is way cool !!
but, it wasn't until the teeny, tiny, sparrow type cuties entered my space that I really, REALLY woke up.
Because this time, it happened in fours.

Four times, suddenly and out of nowhere, these wonderful critters appeared with a burst of energy and beauty and danced their glorious dance for, above and around me.
It's true !
They hovered.
They included.
They enveloped me in their awesome waltz
& It. Was. Magical !

Four. Times.

I've never, ever experienced anything quite like it !!
so of course, I thought, SIGN
This just has to be a sign !!
& you better believe, I googled !

Soul searching.
Peace.
New beginnings
are the repeated words that opened these eyeballs to those fabulous creatures.

Yes.
Yes
Yes
&
Yes, little birdies, you now have my undivided attention with your most amazing head's up.

I cannot wait to see what you and Nature deliver next.

! ! ! ! !

Note to Self:
NOTICE.

:)

I Am My Feelings

 




  

Catching Sunsets

Good Morning !

As I sit here one finger typing this blog of mine, I am watching a gorgeous sunrise.
I type. I look up.
I type. I look up.
I don't want to miss the beautiful morning show.

I think I've made it pretty obvious to anyone who reads these daily rambles, I am an enthusiastic fan of our sun's entrance
& I know I'm lucky.
I can stop everything to enjoy this sight.
I have the time to sip my coffee and observe things.
But, I also know that I've missed a lot too.
Busy, busy.
Just too darn busy.

The good news is, I'm noticing now.
YaY.
Every morning is a brand new awesome.

But, what about those sunsets ?

A few years ago, Youngest Daughter told me of a woman she knows who never misses one.
This gal would literally stop what she was doing to watch the setting sun.
Daughter's friend had made a promise to herself
& what started out as a concentrated effort to catch the sunsets, became a very natural part of her day.

I find that amazing.
It's such a spiritual commitment !
& when I first heard about the woman who chases sunsets, I thought 'I'm going to do that toooooo !'
& I did.
For about a week.
Then I got sidetracked, or forgetful or lazy.
Or all of the above.
I fell back into my habit of eh.
I'll do it tomorrow.
Tomorrow, tomorrow I love you tomorrow
& when I did happen to experience a sunset, it was from a glance out the window
& a muttered 'ooooooo that's a good one ...!'

Well, I'm happy to report I'm back.
Again.
I've adjusted my walking time to catch those sunsets
& if I'm not at my beloved park when the sun makes it's exit, I'll stop where I am and what I'm doing to watch.
It's my concentrated effort promise to myself.
I AM going to acknowledge
&
so far so good.
It really, really IS worth the halt, the anticipate, the look.

Sunrises and sunsets are such a gift.
It's a 4th of July burst of color ! ! every single morning, every single evening.
(errrr, give or take a few)

It's beautiful !
It's  happy !
It's wonderful !
&
It's there.
Waiting to be noticed.

:)

I Am My Feelings

Four Hours

'How much time do people spend on their mobile phones in 2017? Quite a bit.

Over 4 hours a day means we spend over 1/6 of our days on our phones!....'

I read those Hacker Noon words just yesterday

& it kinda blew my mind.

FOUR HOURS ???

Naaaaaa.

They must be talking about someone else because they most definitely cannot be referring to ME.

No.

NOT meeeeeeee.

Well.

Ok.

I've been known to do my fair share of texting and googling and emailing and Pinterest-ing and fitbit-ing and...

hmmmm

Maybe they do mean me.

yikes

But as someone who has very recently stepped away from Facebook ?

I gotta tell you, that time does make a difference

& I SWORE up and down that it would not be noticeable !! because hey now,

I never checked it all THAT much.

It was a minute or three out of my 24 hours. TOPS

& nope !! you better believe, I won't miss it at allllll.  

Welp.

It's been ten days 

& yep

It's been an adjustment.

Seems I spent a lot more moments on the 'book' than I thought.

oops

& surprise !! I've been finding all kinds of things to do with that extra time.

Purging and shredding are my  biggest go-to.

I have boxes and papers and THINGS that have been oh so patiently waiting to be sorted for years !!

& somehow, NOW, I have finally found the time.

YaY

But, I've also refocused my focus to nature and stuff.

There is quite a wonderful world outside and every little everything seems to be wanting my attention now that I'm committed to paying even closer attention.

It's AWESOME.

Like the bee that's been buzzing around my back door or the funky looking clouds this morning or that woodpecker 

oh and the deer !!

FIVE, count em !! FIVE bucks were in my back yard last evening.

Nature is bursting it's very best out these days and I'm absolutely LOVING IT !!

So yeah.

Four Hours on my mobile device, daily ???

Well, errrr, ok ...

I'll admit to a solid two.

But, little by little by little I'm determined to trickle that number down.

Because what I've been viewing in the ten days I've been without Facebook makes me wonder what other joys I've been missing all along.

So watch out World because I'll be looking up up and UP from now on and FOR SURE

& I seriously cannot wait to see.

yeah.

WOW

:)  

I Am My Feelings

 

Noisy Love

<sup>There's usually just one.
One steady, strong, beauty of a hawk perched on the tippy-top, fragile branch of my big, bald tree.
He faces south and he waits
& waits.

But lately, he has company
& now, I've been so very interestingly informed by Google what I thought was a HE, in fact, is a SHE.
Seems the female is the larger of the two
& YaY
I've just learned something new on this brand new today.

SHE is usually so quiet though.
Just minding her biz, stealthily doing her thing but I gotta tell you, the minute HE came into her life ?
um, well, things have been a bit noisy out there.

It's been going on for over a week now
& what I initially thought were seagulls hanging around the back yard with their squawking kind of squawk has turned out to be these two hawks.
From dawn to dusk ...</sup>

The cry of the red-tailed hawk is a two to three second hoarse, rasping scream, described as kree-eee-ar,^[27] that begins at a high pitch and slurs downward.^[32] This cry is often described as sounding similar to a steam whistle.^[5] The red-tailed hawk frequently vocalizes while hunting or soaring, but vocalizes loudest in annoyance or anger, in response to a predator or a rival hawk's intrusion into its territory

& get this ... ! ...

 During courtship, the male and female fly in wide circles while uttering shrill cries. The male performs aerial displays, diving steeply, and then climbing again. After repeating this display several times, he sometimes grasps her talons briefly with his own. Courtship flights can last 10 minutes or more. Copulation often follows courtship flight sequences, although copulation frequently occurs in the absence of courtship flights.


Yes.
That's what's been happening and is happening on these premises as we speak
& I feel like a way too snoopy neighbor but, I can't help listening and I can't stop watching because they are so darn noisy and it's SO INCREDIBLY AWESOME !!

& I am way beyond thrilled that these two creatures have found each other and are courting on MY TREE.
Seriously.
How special is that ??
& the thought that little, bitty, baby hawks might be somewhere in my future ??!?
ohmygosh
That must make me a distant relative or something, right ?
Right ??

Nature
Golly how I adore Nature !

So, don't mind me Mr and Mrs Hawk.
I won't mind your noise machine as long as you don't mind my much too curious eyeballs peering out my back window
Oh & that big, bald, beautifully different tree where your courtship began and continues ?
Consider it my wedding present
& 
those darling kids that will someday be sitting high up top of those branches too ?

They can call me Auntie.

weeeeee.

:)

I Am My Feelings 

 
 

 

 
 

We Can Make It Happen

I have always loved the band, Chicago
& this past weekend, my peeps and I spent a lovely Summer's evening experiencing the power of their music
& if you've never had the joy of seeing them in concert, put it on your Bucket List !
You will not be disappointed

& you know when you get a song stuck in your head ?
Well, Dialogue Parts 1 and 2 has been hunkered in mine since they sang it on Friday
and I'm absolutely loving it !

The song is AWESOME.
& even though it was written and recorded way back in 1971, right smack dab in the middle of everything 1971 had to offer, it fits in perfectly with my feelings of today.

Here are the lyrics but, do me a favor and listen when you have a minute ...

 

Play "Dialogue (parts 1 A…" on Amazon Music

Listen while you read!

Part I

Terry
Are you optimistic
'bout the way things are going?

Peter
No, I never ever think of it at all

Terry
Don't you ever worry
When you see what's going down?

Peter
No, I try to mind my business,
that is, no business at all

Terry
When it's time to function
as a feeling human being, will your
Bachelor of Arts help you get by?

Peter
I hope to study further,
a few more years or so. I also hope
to keep a steady high

Terry
Will you try to change
things, use the power that you have,
the power of a million new ideas?

Peter
What is this power you
speak of and this need for things to
change? I always thought
that everything was fine

Terry
Don't you feel repression just
closing in around?

Peter
No, the campus here is very, very free

Terry
Does it make you angry
the way war is dragging on?

Peter
Well, I hope the President
knows what he's into, I don't know

Terry
Don't you ever see the starvation
in the city where you live, all the
needless hunger all the
needless pain?

Peter
I haven't been there lately,
the country is so fine, but my
neighbors don't seem hungry 'cause
they haven't got the time

Terry
Thank you for the talk,
you know you really eased my mind
I was troubled by the shapes
of things to come.

Peter
Well, if you had my
outlook your feelings would be
numb, you'd always think
that everything was fine

Part II

Group
We can make it happen
We can change the world now
We can save the children
We can make it better
We can make it happen
We can save the children
We can make it happen


What's my POINT ?? you so patiently wonder.

Mad. Trouble. Distress. Unhappiness.
Someone, somewhere.
Forever.
For always.

People fighting.
People hating.
People hurting.

Since the beginning of time, seems Ugly is unavoidable.

But, just like this song proposes ...
WE can make it happen
WE can change the world now
We can save the children ...

WE.

It's all in the way you look at it, friends.
If we choose to see negative we will continue to see negative but, if we choose positive ?

WoW.

Imagine the domino effect of Only. Positive.

Today, tomorrow, the next day and next and next ...
will you try, please ?
Please try.
I'm pretty darn certain you will enjoy and stay in the positive vibe.

& hey ! many thanks, Chicago !
You guys are truly talented musicians and amazing souls
& I have a feeling your wonderful words will continue to be hunkered in my head for a very, VERY long time.

YaY.

:)

I Am My Feelings

   

Quiet Confidence

What. A. Weekend.

& I mean that with every little sense of delightful sincerity that this ol heart can hold.
Filled with music and friends and family and love
& perfect.

It truly was PERFECT

& I don't know if you've noticed, but I have been riding a tidal wave of questions lately.
What and where and how and why ???
and and and ... ??!?
about this and that and that and this.
andandandandand

Yep.
I've been questioning.
I've been doubting.

AGAIN.

& HOW many times have you heard that one out of me ?!?

Seriously.
gaaaaaa.

Sometimes I just want to knock myself upside the head when I get this way
ESPECIALLY when those answers suddenly, quietly and oh so confidently !! appear
& they always, always, ALWAYS appear.

poof
just like that.

When I seek, I find.
There is absolutely no better way to phrase it
& it honestly is as easy as that.

I know you're busy so I won't get into all the teeny, tiny, finely chopped details of my Weekend Journey of Wonderful.
But.
I do need you to know this ....

The answers are there.
The comfort is there.
The everything you need to calm that inner unsteadiness is RIGHT THERE.

Sometimes the eyeballs have to be pried wide open to notice
& as Vanessa Williams so beautifully sings,
'sometimes the very thing you're looking for is the one thing you can't see'
but I promise, the answers you seek are there.

So, YaY.
I am back on my path.
AGAIN
& I feel FABULOUS !!!

hey, um, the next time I become unglued with my why why WHY-s ??!?
Do me a favor and remind me, please.

Seek + Find = Happy.

& feel free to hand over that knock upside the head too.

weeeeeee.

:)

I Am My Feelings

 

Sing A Song

My older brother was born with Polish music in his veins.
I swear he knows every Polka song ever written, word for word
& although he and I have enjoyed a few twirls around the dance floor, I can't say it is my cup of tea.
But, Brother #1 loves a good Polka
& I love him.
That's really all that matters.

My younger sister.
Oh, she's Led Zeppelin.
Always has been, always will be.
Robert Plant is definitely THE man.
He touches something deep down in her soul
& although I've listened to her Zep many times and she's tried to explain her joy, I've never felt it like she feels it.
But, that's fine.
This is who she is and what she loves
& I love her
That's really all that matters.

Me ?
Barry Manilow.
It's no secret. I have adored that man since the beginning of time.
His songs are my Heaven.
It's that simple.

Throw my three other siblings in and we've got ourselves quite a musical mix.
Sister #1 brings Rod Stewart.
Brother #2 entertains with 80's tunes and trivia.
Youngest Sister is all about Duran Duran
& even though I might not enjoy these tunes as much as they enjoy these tunes,
I love these people
& that's really all that matters.

My siblings and I grew up in the same house with the same parents.
We had the same schooling, same environment.
Pretty much the same everything.
Yet we are all so different.
In our musical tastes, in our opinions and in our other life stuff.
Bottom line is that we love each other
& we respect our differences in opinion.
It makes us who we are
& it's quite wonderful, if you ask me.

Ohhhhhh
Human beings.

We are so unique but, so very much alike
& we share this big, ol ball in the sky for such a brief moment in time.

I have my opinions and tastes.
You have your opinions and tastes.
How's about we all just respect these opinions, these differences.
How's about we all just bring ourselves, our music, our uniqueness, our everything to this great big, wonderful table of life
& enjoy.

Just enjoy.

:)

I Am My Feelings

! LOOK !

So I'm standing on my porch yesterday evening, just staring at the sky.
Why ?
Because I can't stop.
It's amazing is what it is and I'm obsessed is what I am.
Completely, totally, wholeheartedly obsessed.

Look up.

Look around.

Ain't it all just so incredibly wonderful ??
& don't tell me it's cloudy
or raining
or you're much too busy ...
Step yourself outside right this very minute and look at that infinite sky.

! LOOK ! 

It is absolutely awesome
& THIS is indescribably invigorating.

This Planet.
This Life.
This Today.

This. Gift.

Another good morning has broken, my friends.
Enjoy it.
Live it.
LOVE IT
&
feel free to become completely, totally, wholeheartedly obsessed.

:)

I Am My Feelings

Feeling Small

I see them almost every day
& I'm positive they are onto the fact that they scare the living daylights out of me.
I call them 'thugs' in my head because an arrogance of bully surrounds them
& I often think my presence annoys them just as much as theirs bothers me.

'oh jeez. here comes THAT one again. let's intimidate'

THEY are a gaggle of geese
& when I see I cringe, I fear, I cower.
I turn very, very small.

& if the other walkers, riders, runners, big, bold, brave human beings on the trail are equally bothered by them ?? I will never know.
They hold their cards well and seem extremely aloof to the fact that these meanies are blocking their path.

It's me
& I know it's me.
Because I allow.

I've invited that dread to take hold of me.
I have turned on the distress signal.
I am the one who has made these simple creatures terrifying.

Terrifying because I saw a video once about a random goose attack.
Terrifying because uh, ya know, it happens ALL THE TIME.
Terrifying because I believe what THEY say because they are ALWAYS right.

errrr.
No. They're not.
THEY have been known to get things wrong too
 & seriously, WHAT am I so quivery, jittery, dreadfully apprehensive about ??

Fear.
What a powerfully mighty force
& what a web it weaves when I ALLOW it to have it's way with me.

I read a quote recently that has really stuck in my brain.

" ...  faith is taking that first step before God reveals the second step."

Yeah.

That.

I really need to do a whole lot more of THAT.

Hey there, Mr Goose and Company.
Go ahead and bring it.
Because I have had enough of fear playing games with me and my life
& I'm pretty darn tired of feeling small.

D. O. N. E.
I am Done.

So if you happen to hear about a random goose attack on an innocent somebody on a walking trail ?
No worries, my peeps.

 It's not me.

:)

I Am My Feelings

Deactivated

Have you ever had a thought just tap, tap, tap at your brain ?

Continual.
Constant.
There.
Hunkered in the shadows, with it's 'I'm not leaving until we address this issue' humph.

Welp.
That was me with my very dear pal, Facebook.

Until yesterday.

Because yesterday, I addressed that little something
& I followed what my inner voice has been suggesting all along.

I deactivated.
I stepped away.
I stopped.

Are you SURE you want to do this ?? Facebook asked once, twice, again, as it rattled off the people I might be upsetting with my departure.
Are ? You ? SURE ???

Yes, friends.
I am sure.

Why ?
Because my mind keeps taking me back.

It was 2009 and I was on my "I'm 50 !!" Colorado birthday trip, provided by my way too generous children.
Sisters, niece and I were having a hiking, picnicking type of glorious day when someone pondered ...
"Are you on Facebook yet ? You should be on Facebook!"

& so, I did, I was, I liked
& it truly has been a wonderful journey !

The reunions with my long lost peeps.
The sharing of moments and food and songs and selfies and puppies and clouds and trees and stuff.
The checking in-s.
The Happy Birthdays.
Happy Anniversaries.
Happy ! Happy ! :) !
The wish you were here having fun with us too.
The... the ....

ahhhh Facebook.
We have definitely come a long way, baby
& I will forever be thankful to YOU.

You brought me out of my shell, is what you did.
My 'I'll Just Keep These Poems and Stories Tucked Safely Away In This Drawer Forever' fear.
I was scared and timid and I would not allow anyone to enter this very, VERY private part of me
& although it was a slow and I do mean S L O W, extremely tedious and yes ! rather torturous process, I did it.
We did it.

I'm not afraid anymore, Facebook.

YaY

So WHY deactivate, you ask ?

Because my inner voice is quite insistent
& it's telling me to go back.
Go back to that Colorado day before.
Go back to old school.
Go back to quiet 
& shhhhh

Just shhhhh

No worries, my devoted "book" buddies
& please know, it's nothing personal !
I've left you but, my blog words shall remain via the unrelenting loyalty of Brother, Sister, Friends and Husband and I truly hope you continue to read, follow.
My profile picture and I just have to go elsewhere for now,
For awhile.

Forever ?

hmmmm.

I'll keep you posted.
I promise.

:)

I Am My Feelings

What What

So.
I've been thinking lately
& yes, we all know what happens when this brain starts buzzing a bit too much.

oy

But, it keeps pestering and pondering and asking,
what

What if ?
What then ?
What's next ?
What What ??

What if I stop.
Stop writing, that is.
Not writing, writing.
Blog writing.
This every day busy biz.

Would anyone notice ?
Would anyone care ?
& if I did just stop, then what ??
and what then ?

Oy.

& I hate to sound whiny-ish or hey ! somebody hand over a compliment
but, seriously, I really don't know
& I'm very confused.
If there's something else out there ...
where ?
how ?
what ??

OY

So.
I took my troubled mind to where I always take me troubled mind
& I asked please, PLEASE just show me something.
Tell me Some. Thing.
A sign,
I need a sign.

Thank You, Somebody.
You were placed in my path when I needed you most and you've said the words I so needed to hear
& once again, I am reminded of the power of one.
You, my friend, are the fuel, the nudge, the reminder that I so desperately craved.

This blog.
Ooooooh, this blog !!
It energizes me.
It exhausts me
but knowing I am helping your simple, steadfast "one"
Yeah.
I got my sign.

So.
What if ?
&
What's next ?
&
What What ??

I'm pretty positive I will continue because my soul refuses to let me stop.
It reminds me every single minute of every single day that I love to write, that I MUST write.
It tells me to be patient, that I am in a holding pattern of sorts, that I am adjusting.
So patient I shall
& adjust I shall.
I shall, I will, until my what what becomes my done done.

Trust
& the rest is easy.

Thanks for sharing your power, Somebody.
Your awesome power of one.

:)

I Am My Feelings

Continue ...

My timing could not have been more perfect but, as I was muddling through it all, truth be told, I questioned
again
& A LOT

Maybe I'll just blame it on the clouds.
yeah
YEAH
because they were feeling every bit of it too.
They muttered, they stuttered.
They errr-ed, and well ??? and uh, maybe, maybe not.

Not awful.
Not great.
Not grumpy.
Not happy.
A somewhere in between.
Shall we downpour or sunshine today ?

hmmmm

The rumbling thunder far away to my north was taunting "sure ! go ahead ! I promise I'll behave"
& the humidity was thick as a brick and equally stubborn.
So yeah.
I doubted
but,
I began.

It became pretty darn obvious that I had made the wrong choice when I could hear those storm clouds' boisterous bellowing over the very pleasant music in my ears
& I thought 'oh no. NO.'
because at that point in time, I was in the middle of no man's land where shelter was concerned.
Maybe I could shimmy down that little incline and hide under a tree, I contemplated,
or if all else fails I could make a dash to ... to ...
oy
I'm going to get soaked.
SOAKED

& as that intriguing thought made my mood of the day all the more wishy-washy, I pondered ...
Should I ?
Could I ?
What if ?
How will ?
& WHY didn't I grab a flippin umbrella ??!?

ugh

Questions.
Doubts.

It didn't help that I was pretty much THE only one out there too.
My fellow walkers, joggers, the dogs, their BFFs and even those extremely loyal golfers were nowhere to be found.
I guess I must have missed the Breaking News Weather Memo.
DON'T GO WALKING BECAUSE IT'S GOING TO STORM seemed to be the word on the street.

oh boy

but I walked, I pressed on.
I continued
& I kept walking, kept pressing, kept continuing no matter what !! those clouds were brewing,
no matter their menacing noise
no matter the foreboding darkness riding on top of my back
no matter the questions
no matter the doubts

& guess what ?
Guess What ??

I made it to the end of my trail invigorated ! determined ! happy ! and dry !
& as I looked up to the skies with a smile of gratitude ....

WoW.

Um.
Note To Self :

Just.
Keep.
Walking.

Press On

& continue  ...

No. Matter. What.


:)


I Am My Feelings

Jolly

I waited in a Waiting Room yesterday.
I didn't particularly want to be there
& if I had a choice of places I'd rather be, I would definitely be somewhere else.
But, I was
& so,
I waited.

The woman across from me waited too
& the the man to her left.
A few children were also in that Waiting Room
& they patiently waited too.

We all kept ourselves occupied.
There were magazines to be read, a tv to be watched and games to be played.
Everyone waiting in that Waiting Room kept themselves quite content.
It's what people do in Waiting Rooms

& the wait wasn't a terribly long stretch of time.
The friendly staff had things moving at a very snappy rate.
So, considering the fact that no one really wanted to be waiting, life was very ok and somewhat lovely

& then,
She walked in.
I have dubbed her 'Attitude' because that's what she was, that's what she carried.
Attitude made it very obvious, she did not want to be there.
But, instead of dealing the way everyone else in that room was dealing, Attitude wanted to share her misery.
She started with the very kind lady at the desk
& the domino effect of Attitude's miserableness was felt throughout that room.

Awkward.
Cold.
Uncomfortable.
All because of one person.
One grumpy, sour person.

It seemed like forever but finally, thankfully, Attitude decided to sit down.
Her noise fell silent with a big, huffy humph.

Luckily, at that very moment along walked in a UPS man.
I have dubbed him "Jolly" because that's what he was, that's what he carried.
With a "Good Afternoon !" and a gigantic smile, that wonderfully happy man changed the room in an instant.
He lit it up with his awesome light.
We could feel it
& suddenly, that Waiting Room was alive again.

Chatter.
Smiles.
Cheerfulness.
All because of one person.
One bubbly, it's great to be alive !! person.

I'm so thankful I was in the Waiting Room when Jolly arrived.
He was my gentle reminder of how very pleasant life can be when happiness is shared.

ahhhhh.

I'd so rather be jolly.

:)

I Am My Feelings

Of Thee I Sing

Well, weee.
I don't know about you but, dang, I sure had fun !

Family, friends, festivals and fireworks.
Parades and parks and sunshine and glee.
You gotta admit, life seriously does not get much better than that !

& yeah, it's a Wednesday that feels like a Monday
& uh huh, I'm awfully tired too
& no, I don't want to get back to  my "normal" just yet
nope
not yet

So, wait.
Before we pick up the pieces of America's awesome birthday bash and step into the grind of our every day,
I need to ask just one, little bitty, teeny tiny, favor.

Remember.

Remember it, remember this
&
while you're at it, bottle it up.
Pass it around.

That pride, the joy.
That I'm so darn enthusiastic to be an American revelry.
The red white and blue burst of happy.
That life is sweet and I'm so darn fortunate.

Yeah.
That.

Can we all hang onto THAT, please ?
please.

Because the noise machine will be revving up again
& those ugly chatter gurus will turn it on and persist.
They will pester, they will insist, we are a nation divided
& we're really not supposed to like each other
& see the guy over there ?!?
He's your enemy
so don't you dare be decent
or kind
or nice.

ugh.

UGH.

Please, let's please !!  hold on and remember every single one of the one for all, all for one moments.
The God Bless America
&
oh beautiful for spacious skies
&
my country 'tis of thee
and and and
THAT

Cause you love this land
& I love this land
& the guy down the street and the gal on the train truly love this land too
&
you know you felt it and I know I feel it.
That love of country.
That precious proud.

!! America !!

Yeah.

AMERICA.

Let's remember.
Let's try.
Let's do, let's please, let's BE a little bit more of THAT. 

:)


I Am My Feelings

Happy Birthday

It's your birthday America !!

!! YaY !!

& before I get yet another day of food, fireworks and happiness into gear, I just need to take this moment to STOP and shhhhhh.
To remember.
To remind.
To say.

YOU are AWESOME !! America !!

Thank You for THIS.
ALL of THIS.
For the freedom, the pride, the love, the opportunity.

Because of YOU, I can do anything.
Any. Thing.
You offer me the chance to know, to grow, to say, to be
& I'm so darn proud of you.
Of US.
Together, we are absolutely amazing.

Happy, Happy Birthday, America.
I'm so very fortunate to call you my country, my home, my friend.
I love you.
I applaud you.
I celebrate YOU.

! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

:)

I Am My Feelings

Eves

I love Eves.
I  love love love love love Eves.
The day before the Big Day.

I love the excitement in the air.
I love the anticipation of it all.
I love the jolly, neighborly, it's great to be alive, enjoyable moods of my fellow human beings.
In fact, I would be so bold to say I love Eve even more than Holiday.
I do.
Because it's all so pre-party happy !

What's even better is that today is the 3rd of July
& tomorrow is my favorite celebration of all.
! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
Which makes this day the EVE of my Very Favorite Day.
! weeeeee !
Watch out.
I am thisclose to an explosion of gleeeeeeee.

You know why I love this holiday so much ?
Parades.
Fireworks.
Fun
 &
America.

AMERICA.

YaY.

! Today !
It all begins today.

Happy 4th of July Eve, my friends.

! Enjoy !

! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

:)

I Am My Feelings

Beers and Ears

As most towns do in this good ol U S of A, there is a 4th of July Festival in mine each year. 
Filled with rides to be ridden, games to be played, food to be eaten, crafts to be envied
& 
always the fan favorite
A Beer Tent.

Just the sound of those combined words sounds oh so pleasant.
Beer. Tent.
A tent full of beer

& friends
& music
& Summer night happy.

YaY.

There was a time in my life when the beer tent was THE best part of the fest.
Woooo weeeee.
The fun that was had, the gallons consumed.
But, somewhere down the line, a thing called responsibility crept into my life
& the 4th of July Festival became all about my children.
Goodbye, beer tent.
sniffle. sniffle. 
Helloooooo rides and games and enviable crafts.

There's no need for overwhelming sadness though.
Oh no, it's all good.
Because the responsible years escorted a tasty delight called Elephant Ears into my life.
And suddenly, everything changed.

Doughy, cinnamon-y, sugary.
mmmmm mm
Just thinking about an Elephant Ear fills me with giddy because there is really no other anything that can even compare.

JOY.

Now, try as I might to stop them, those darn years keep on moving along
& those children of mine are not children anymore.
They too have taken a turn experiencing that beer glee.
weeeee.
Funny thing though...
Somewhere in all those years our beloved beer tent became a 'maybe we'll go...maybe we won't'  debate
& most times, won't wins.

But, Elephant Ears  ...?
Oh, Elephant Ears.
Fourth of July is just not the 4th of July without an oooooo sooooo wonderfully delicious Elephant Ear.

It's all about priorities, my friends
& mine will forever be !! YUM !!

:)

I Am My Feelings

Halfway There

Hello July 1st
& thank you for the wallop of a head's up.
Yes, YES ! I am very much aware that you are the halfway point of the year, so please,
don't flaunt.

One. Half.

oy

OY

So.
As a reminder to me, I am replaying the big ol promise that was made wayyyyy back in brand new, January
& for those who happen to be keeping score,
!! SURPRISE !!
although I have slacked off a time or three,
I'm still in.

The question is ...
Are You ??

c'mon

--------------------

There we were, sitting around the front room Christmas night, our bellies happily filled to the rim
with me, personally, just finishing up my fair share of Lazy Pierogi.

Ooooooh, Lazy Pierogi.

That infamous recipe calls for one pound of butter.
ONE POUND of BUTTER
& yet, it's a family favorite !! I say each year.
I'll make it.
Because, you know, the holidays just wouldn't seem right without Lazy Pierogi.

uh huh.

"This has got to STOP" one of my overstuffed people suggested
& yes, we all agreed.

THIS has got to stop

& somewhere in that simple, ashamed of ourselves and our endless cookie consumption conversation, an idea emerged.

A Challenge.
A New Year, New Me, we can sooooo do this together Challenge.

YaY

Starting on January 2, 2017 our lives CAN change !! we declared.

Five days per week.
30 pushups
100 sit-ups
To be completed in intervals or at once, it's up to the participant
&
ok
Crunches, leg lifts or squats can be substituted for sit-ups
& yes, you can mix it up however you choose.
Yep.
"wall' pushups are perfectly legit.

hmmmm.

We all sat there and pondered.

hmmmm.

"It will be a piece of CAKE !", I exclaimed.
Easy as can beeeeesy.

Five days out of a seven day week ?
Surely, we can handle that !
& intervals ?
There's 24 hours in a day, my peeps !!
C'MON !!

& so, it began.
If you want in, come on in we decided.
If not, that's entirely up to you and your biz
& what started with the privy who happened to be in my house that night has expanded across the states to the whole family.

The Challenge is ON, baby.

& welp.
Today begins Day 3, for me.
I chose to start my quest on the first of the year because I had not partied it up on the eve
& because the Lazy Pierogi I inhaled on Christmas found a nice, cozy place to hunker on my hips.

eek.

So.
Day 3
& every muscle I own hurts.
My stomach, my arms, my legs ...
Yep.
Every single everybody is in on the BIG OUCH.

But, I LOVE IT
& not only because it's the healthy thing to do
I love it because the family and I are in this together.
We all hurt
& we really, REALLY would much rather not be a part of this silly challenge !!
Who's idea was this anyways !??!

grrrrrr.

But ...
we will.
We will because the others are doing it
Because the support is there, the bragging is there.
The high fives and laughs and the NO MORE LAZY P !! is there

& not one of us really cares if the other actually does 500 sit-ups per week.
We've committed to the doing
& that's really all that matters.

So yeah.
Excuse me, now, as I slowly, carefully, ever so easily shuffle this aching body of mine to my morning cup of coffee.

YOUCH.
I'm sore.

But, as long as they remain 'IN', I shall remain 'IN'
Because I love my family, I encourage my family
& I'll be darned if I'm going to be the only one who DIDN'T next Christmas night.
I'll never, ever hear the end of it from the ones that DID.

C'mon.

:)

I Am My Feelings