A Thrill of Hope

Oh, how I adore those four, simple words.

Powerful lyrics to a most beautiful song
& as I listen to 'O Holy Night' just one more time, again
I am taken back

... to Christmas mornings as a child ...

A nudge,
wake up ! wake up !
The realization that yes, it's TODAY.
Excited whispers.
Until ...
until ...
the 'go ahead' signal as Dad maneuvered the brightest of spotlights.
The giggles, the glee.
A thrill of hope.
 
&
... to the birth of my children ...

PUSH !
You're almost there.
Just a few more.
You've got this. 
PUSH ! !
Until ...
until ...
that ever so sudden pause, a tiny, sacred wail and the glorious sound of a newborn's cry.
Indescribable emotions.
Unbelievable joy.
A thrill of hope.

& yes,
... to my hardest reality thus far ...

A panicked call,
that no no nooooo rush to the hospital
& those bargaining pleads of please
PLEASE.
Don't leave me, Ma
Not now. I'm not ready. I can't.
Unstoppable tears.
Goodbye.
Until ...
until ...
Slowly, steadily, quietly.
An awakened guidance,
a knowing,
a trust.
A thrill of hope.

Oh, how I adore those four, simple words.

:)

I Am My Feelings